It’s an anomaly for a man to get equal rights with the mother of his children with regard to visitation & custody. So often it’s the man that must leave the home when couples separate, then the woman calls all the shots-things such as when, and sometimes even if, he can visit with his children. If only the courts could discern which is the better parent to have primary care over the children, rather than having the default always be the mother unless she is a drug addict or poses another type of equivalent danger.
Numerous moms over the decades have significantly interfered with the father/child relationship. Having a father around is so crucial in a child’s life. Granted, there are fathers who aren’t as involved in their child’s life as others, but it’s still important for every child to know who their father is and how much he cares for them. Next to the love of our heavenly Father, the unconditional love of a mother and a father toward a child is the most complete love one can experience. Think about it. That relationship is so special, and so sacred, even when all other relationships go south, that child has the comfort of knowing he, or she, can always lean on parents for that loving support and approval. To remove either one of those leaves a void in the child’s life that cannot be filled any other way.
It’s in the best interest of a child for parents to put their differences aside and work together for the good of their children. Time and again I have seen mothers use their children to “get back” at their ex-husbands, or they use the children to relay information to the ex such as when they are dating someone, or when their life is going great. It’s as if they want to use the child as a conduit by which they can rub their now glorious life in the face of their ex. If you are a parent who does this, stop it. Your child is not a pawn, and this will leave a lasting impression on your children that will come back to bite you in the future. Kids aren’t oblivious to this adult chess game, and it only serves to make them resentful and suspicious of what real love is. Just as I’m writing this, I can think of numerous moms who do this very thing, and several others who constantly change the visitation rules to show the non-custodial parent they can do whatever they wish.
Fathers, if you are dealing with someone who does this, make sure you discuss this with your attorney. The mom could be charged with contempt of court if she is continually interfering with your right to have visitation with your child.
If there are fathers out there who are experiencing this, Sensible Life would like to hear your story. Please write to us at editor@sensiblelife.com.
Connect with Us